Tuesdays suck.

Every Tuesday since the end of 2013 we have been going to DBT in Richmond. The first few times it was fine, I didn't get much resistance from Alex. He knows that this therapy serves a purpose. Coping skills. How to diffuse the big, ugly feelings that make him do the behaviors like cutting and bingeing. It's all based on Buddhist concepts of mindfulness, which most kids will probably think are boring and stupid. These skills will only work in a real world situation if 1. you can recall them at the right moment 2. are taking an active part in your recovery and 3. give a shit. From what I can see, none of the kids presently in group really WANT to be there. Some are more like "Well, I'm here so I'll just roll with it." You are required to interact but only minimally. Last session Alex did not want to participate and was essentially forced to by the therapist. Since then, he has been angry and doesn't want to go back. So, yesterday he went to his regular one-on-one with the therapist, which was fine. We have an hour between that appointment and the group session. That hour began with an argument and ended up with both of us crying in the parking lot. I'm not going to go into what was said but let's just say, we both lost our shit for a minute. The therapist texted me and after cooling down we agreed to try again next week. I'm still sad this happened the way it did. These are the times that I question what I'm doing, if I'm doing the right things, am I being too overbearing, maybe I should back off and just let the bad stuff happen? I dunno. I want to say "Sure, you can quit." but the reality is, he needs therapy. Even if only 5 minutes out of the hour can sink in, it's worth it. I have to remember that with any recovery, it's progress not perfection. 

Buddhist Mindfulness