Our GYN adventure!

I have to be reminded of some key facts sometimes.  I'm not tooting a horn here but we ARE incredible people. Him for who he has become and me, for being able to get him to his destination in one piece. We are creating the environment for his happiness. We have made about a BAJILLION mistakes, they were all valuable. And #4 should be our daily living MOTTO. The road less travelled is generally where we live. Not to say we aren't afraid, because going completely outside of most people's norms can be terrifying, but we do it anyway (gently sometimes, aggressively when warranted) So there it is, my affirmations for my mental health.....which is bordering on lunacy much of the time.

So, yesterday we had the GYN appointment with Dr. Lea Mahoney. She works out of West End Ob & Gyn in Henrico, Va.  She had been referred to us from another Trans individual (FTM-friendly GYN's are hard to find) and so we went in for a consult as self-pay ($120.00).  She was great and really put us at ease. After taking a history and hearing my sons story, she asked us what we were looking to get done.  We were straight to the point about his pain being an issue, he wants a hysterectomy. She is definitely on board and after doing an obligatory pelvic exam (Alex is NOT a fan) she suggests the Lap/Vaginal procedure.  It's about a 4-6 week scheduling wait to get into the OR. So, that pretty much wraps up the doctors end of things for now.

The office staff thinks we might be able to get Tricare to cover it.  They give me some instructions for some paperwork things to do. I'm skeptical but will try it. I'll post whenever I get around to doing those things. lol.

We will plan on self-pay until we know otherwise. I'd hate to get my hopes up.

Alex's GoFundMe Page!

Nuclear Ovaries!

Go Fund Me

My Xander.

It's been almost a year since I last posted. Crazy that it has flown by so quickly. With Xander starting college last August and working and just life in general, the internet has not seemed a priority.

Medically we have run into some roadblocks. Xander has been suffering with "cycling" pain. Even though he doesn't have a period anymore, he still "cycles" and the ovaries cause him some really tremendous pain. The release of the female hormones also destabilize him quite a bit and he becomes depressed and anxious, it's really just like PMS used to be as a girl. I took him in to be seen about it, checking to make sure there was no physiological reason for the pain. He got an ultrasound and it was normal. And yet, the pain came back. I took him back in and the PA was fantastic and we talked about oophorectomy. She put in a referral for him to be seen at the Naval Med Center ( they have surgeons) so we could discuss this further.  

The referral that I get in the mail is an outsource doctors office. I spend days speaking to different Tricare reps trying to get them to understand that we need to go to the Navy Med Center. Every one of them explains that transgender transition surgeries are NOT covered and they will not participate in any surgery to that end. It's about PAIN, not transitioning. Didn't matter how many times I said it or who I talked to...they all said the same thing. We aren't covering it.

Ok, well.....it still needs to be done. He's in pain and I am the MOM. We will get this done. 

Unfortunately, I am not able at this exact moment to be in full "MAMA bear" mode. I have huge stressors at school right now and my head in just elsewhere. Days roll by and I know he is feeling like this really important thing is being dismissed by me. I wake up the other day and, as part of my morning routine, check my Facebook on my phone. He has made a GoFundMe page. I feel like the worst mom ever.

Anyway, we are moving forward. I'm setting up an appointment with a private GYN in Richmond for a consultation. I'm not sure what this whole thing will cost but Xander is determined to pay for most of it himself.  He has picked up extra nights at WalMart ( which I don't like, keeps him out too late during the school week) but he is juggling a full time school schedule, work and having a social life. 

So that's our new adventure. I'll post as we work through the whole process.

Sia and James Cordon. Funny.